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Life: Are You In Control of Your Emotions?





I have such a huge problem with this and by reading it I saw that majority of us do so I thought I might share this as a rule of thumb with the readers.

Nothing Personal, Just Business
Perhaps one of the most important things you will learn in life is how to control your emotions. Too many people are unable to hold back and they let loose every chance they get. The effect this has in business is that it shows others that you have no self-control. It proves that you can't even control your own balls. So how the hell are you going to control employees and run a business?

If you can't manage yourself, you sure won't be able to manage others, and business is about people boys, remember that. It always comes down to people. Even in my line of work, I can't just whack someone; I need to get permission first. This avoids guys taking early dirt naps because someone lost their temper over some broad or some loaded dice.

Logic Vs. Emotion
People operate on two levels: rational and emotional. For most people, the emotional side is predominant. That is, they let their emotions and feelings rule their actions. Maybe they are just too lazy to think things through or they just don't have the brains to do so. Very few people live by logic, but it's these people that run the world. They calculate everything and don't let their feelings get in the way of getting the job done.

In this case I'm referring to controlling your temper. Some people (friends, colleagues, reporters, etc.) will try to make you lose your balance and logic by making you first lose your temper. When you lose your cool, you don't think straight, and consequently do and say things that can hurt you.

Control Your Emotions
Your goal isn't to stop feeling completely, but to no longer show the outside world that you are feeling anything on the emotional level. Emotions are usually communicated via body language and voice.

Thus, to control your emotions, you have to be aware of what your body is doing and what your mouth is saying.

Control What You Say

It's easier to control what comes out of your mouth. When someone says something insulting, disagreeable or aimed at ticking you off, you should just say nothing, if possible.

You may be insulted, but remember; it's nothing personal, just business. If you look at things from that perspective, nothing will ever insult you. In a business setting, if someone brings up phony arguments or rigged numbers, don't raise your voice and start yelling because it'll look like you've lost your head and your credibility will follow.

What you need to do is talk in your regular tone of voice and give rational arguments. Don't get inflamed at any point, just reason with the others. It may take time, but you will prevail.

Never say anything insulting back and never reply in a sarcastic way. You want the other guy to start wondering why he's not getting to you. He'll keep turning up the heat and he'll eventually look like the unreasonable fool.

Control What You Do
Controlling your body language is not as simple. We all have "tells," that is, little body language signals that tell the other person how we are feeling and by extension, what we may be thinking. What you need to practice (and this takes time) is remaining in a normal state. You should look the same whether you get good news or bad. That way, the other person will never really know what you're thinking.

Pay close attention to your eyes, mouth, how fast you breathe, and how much you move your hands and feet. For example, if you tap your feet rapidly upon hearing bad news and never normally tap your feet, it's a dead giveaway that the news is bugging you.

Each time you lose control of your emotions, think of it as a kink in your armor. If you lose it too often, you'll have dents and eventually holes in your outer shell; holes that your enemies will use to finish you off. So keep your cool at all times, no matter how "justified" you would be in losing your marbles. And remember; it's nothing personal, just business.

Watch your backs and keep your noses clean.

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